From my years of experience helping clients on first dates, the most important thing you can do to build a connection with your date is to focus your attention on them and really make them feel like you are genuinely interested in them. Here are some tips for making that happen:
- Treat their statements like gems of wisdom – everyone wants to know that their thoughts are appreciated
- Turn off that cell phone and ignore the hottie walking by – your attention should stay on your date
- Give your date eye contact about 70% of the time. 100% will make them feel uncomfortable and they can interpret the discomfort as feeling butterflies in their stomach for you
- Use their name often – it makes people feel more connected to you
- Smile often and assume they can do everything successfully
- Answer questions about yourself enthusiastically and confidently and then redirect the conversation back to the subjects your date is interested in
- Be positive and grateful about where you are, what you are doing, and who you are doing it with
- Treat your date like they are the most important person in the world
Reprinted with permission from Loveawake Dating Site. If you are single and haven’t met the right person yet, check out these pages:
Get off the Internet!!!
Huh? A web-based dating company telling you to get offline???
Yes! While we completely believe that Sparkology is the best place to meet quality people, you should try to move from the digital world to the real world soon after you meet them*.
- Quick to Judge: Ever read the book Blink, by Malcolm Gladwell? You form your opinion of the person you’re chatting with within a few seconds. Realistically, after skimming their profile and sending one or two messages back and forth, you can weed out those who are completely not worth your time. And if you follow our advice for keeping first dates quick and frugal, it won’t cost you much time or money. So follow your gut and get out and meet people!
- False Expectations: When you go back and forth online, you conjecture an image in your mind of that person. Like a kid playing make-believe, you fill in the gaps from your online interactions with your fantasies. Your imagination creates a surreal person, one that the real candidate could never live up to when you do finally meet.
Even if things don’t go perfectly or the chemistry just isn’t right, you know that the person is a credentialed member of the Loveawake family. They are exciting, outgoing, classy, ambitious, and beautiful. At the very least, you’ve just made a great new friend!
* Provided you take all proper safety precautions!!!